Top 10 Pug Players.

[Rosco]

#10: The Gearscore checker

This is the guy who instead of hitting mobs in an instance as dps is spastically looking at wow-heroes, updating the armory as fast as he can. Loudly declares to the group that in fact, he has a better gearscore than the rest of you and should be listened to in every situation. Possibly might be doing more damage than the rest of the people in the instance, but is only actually in the instance 20% of the time. Boot as soon as possible.

#9: The "I can't do this"
Usually a healer as DPS are expected to be mindless, but sometimes a tank. As soon as an instance with any degree of difficulty is loaded, (Oculus, AN, ICC instances, ToC) the "I can't do this" immediately proclaims "Don't have the gear for this, sorry" and leaves group. Is always geared enough for the instance, but possesses no degree of skill whatsoever. You could boot them, but their shame usually makes them leave before you can.

#8: The guy who did this a million times before and never had a problem with it

You all know who this guy is. He's the one tanking Bronjahm next to the soul fragments so they heal him 13 times in a row, or doesn't stand behind the saronite boulders until he gets 40 stacks of freezing ice and dies. He stands in the ghoul explosions in ToC, underneath Marrowgar, and in the fires on Goremok, but he never had a problem with it before. Declares this very loudly and repeatedly, despite obviously having no clue what to do in the encounter. Usually reverts to #10, and starts chanting his gear score repeatedly as proof of his knowledge.

#7: The dps who knows exactly what to do, but doesn't

This is the person who acts really confused when he chains off a 10k howling blast in the middle of 20 mobs and dies instantly, or stands in a whirlwind and demands heals, usually while standing in it. Will usually blame the healer after taking prodigious amounts of avoidable damage that should never be taken in the first place. Is often dead, refuses to run back, and instead asks for a rez. Should be booted at earliest convienience.

#6: MANA!

This is the healer that doesn't quite understand how instances work, or that they can in fact use things to regenerate their mana, such as abilities and drinks. Follows the tank around like a lost puppy and talks with one finger. Slowly types out N-e-e-d t-o d-r-i-n-k while not drinking, holding up every pull. Will usually crack in any pressure situation and leave group in shame. Constantly has to be reminded that they can, in fact, drink between pulls, and must be encouraged to do so.

#5: I'm not really sure what my abilities do...

These folks are the lost. The ones who have somehow managed to get to level 80 without actually looking at any of their abilities. These are the 70 point affliction warlocks or full BM hunters that mysteriously never actually use Haunt, Unstable affliction, or Bestial wrath. Usually have talent trees that are mishmash and horrible to look at. Usually pulling under 1k dps, or seen casting incomprehensible spells at the worst times.

#4: ... I had what ability?

People who, mysteriously, have levelled to 80 and don't actually know what abilities they HAVE. Usually a healer, usually when asked where certain things are. Things include such important spells as Abolish Disease, Divine Plea, Cleansing Totem, or Innervate. When asked why they are not using these important spells, generally stony silence or a quick group quit happens.

#3: This isn't how I do it on my main!

Ah, these guys. They do everything different, whether you are tanking or healing or just straight damage, they've done it better, and they do it completely different than you do. Never mind the fact that right now, they're doing what they're supposed to be doing terribly, they're just on an alt and don't really care, but you should listen to them, because they're in a top 50 guild in the world, and their advice should be listened to. Should be removed at the earliest possibility.

#2: Wow Life Coaches/ Touch Typers

Even though they're playing on their hunter, have one of you on autofollow and have 80% autoshot damage, these fellows decide to teach you everything about the game so that you can learn as you play. Usually a healer, this person decides to fill the void between heals with witty commentary about how the game should be played, usually resulting in someone's death immediately after. Is always baffled as to how exactly that happened while they were typing, there really shouldn't have been that much damage going out on a pull. They will go on to describe exactly what the mobs in that pull were doing by pulling out recount records. Knows exactly what everything does and is, just not how to play the game or how to react to it.

#1: The Entitled Prick

Probably fitting into at least 3 of these categories, the entitled prick can be seen pulling random mobs around, coaching players on exactly how bad they are, all while doing terrible dps, a horrible job in tanking, or a lacklustre job in healing. May also be your best dps, but is usually dead because he disregards any part of encounters other than his recount numbers. Links dps meters constantly. If he dies, the healer is to blame. No questions asked. If he was crushed by a saronite boulder, his health should've been maxed. Usually is able to heal or prevent damage, but never does. Nothing is his fault, you should've been doing a better job to prevent his death. You don't want to remove him because he's actually semi-competent, but he's just so much of an assbag that you really have to.

[Sanderz]

kipp is #1

[Crazy Diana]

100% abec

#3: This isn't how I do it on my main!

Ah, these guys. They do everything different, whether you are tanking or healing or just straight damage, they've done it better, and they do it completely different than you do. Never mind the fact that right now, they're doing what they're supposed to be doing terribly, they're just on an alt and don't really care, but you should listen to them, because they're in a top 50 guild in the world, and their advice should be listened to. Should be removed at the earliest possibility.

#2: Wow Life Coaches/ Touch Typers

Even though they're playing on their hunter, have one of you on autofollow and have 80% autoshot damage, these fellows decide to teach you everything about the game so that you can learn as you play. Usually a healer, this person decides to fill the void between heals with witty commentary about how the game should be played, usually resulting in someone's death immediately after. Is always baffled as to how exactly that happened while they were typing, there really shouldn't have been that much damage going out on a pull. They will go on to describe exactly what the mobs in that pull were doing by pulling out recount records. Knows exactly what everything does and is, just not how to play the game or how to react to it.

#1: The Entitled Prick

Probably fitting into at least 3 of these categories, the entitled prick can be seen pulling random mobs around, coaching players on exactly how bad they are, all while doing terrible dps, a horrible job in tanking, or a lacklustre job in healing. May also be your best dps, but is usually dead because he disregards any part of encounters other than his recount numbers. Links dps meters constantly. If he dies, the healer is to blame. No questions asked. If he was crushed by a saronite boulder, his health should've been maxed. Usually is able to heal or prevent damage, but never does. Nothing is his fault, you should've been doing a better job to prevent his death. You don't want to remove him because he's actually semi-competent, but he's just so much of an assbag that you really have to.

[Burlock]

11. the kind that reads long forum posts while in an instance.

[Nouhstekehue]

11. the kind that reads long forum posts while in an instance.

Yogg is hard.

[mininolan]

#1: The Entitled Prick

Probably fitting into at least 3 of these categories, the entitled prick can be seen pulling random mobs around, coaching players on exactly how bad they are, all while doing terrible dps, a horrible job in tanking, or a lacklustre job in healing. May also be your best dps, but is usually dead because he disregards any part of encounters other than his recount numbers. Links dps meters constantly. If he dies, the healer is to blame. No questions asked. If he was crushed by a saronite boulder, his health should've been maxed. Usually is able to heal or prevent damage, but never does. Nothing is his fault, you should've been doing a better job to prevent his death. You don't want to remove him because he's actually semi-competent, but he's just so much of an assbag that you really have to.

sup mininolan here

[Rosco]

The Overly Cautious
We all know this guy usually the tank in UK with 35k unbuffed hp and great gear, pulls the smallest group poss and marks everyone of them while explaining skull=kill first x=next kill square=third kill circle=fourth, stops after every group kill to mark the next,waits till the healer is full mana then hits the everyone ready key, and on boss fights gives a 10 minute dissertation on the dynamics of the full fight and a what to do if things go wrong explanation. MARK

11: The looter
This person rolls need on EVERY single item in game That they can equip. This person is different then the ninja, who often rolls on things they cannot use. The looter however, rolls on things they think looks cool, has better stats(according to them), is more rare, and the list goes on. If you see this person, boot asap. 65% a dk with 71 pts. In unholy
12: The silent type
This is the person who never says anything throughout the run. This person may not sound bad, but most times the silent type is a really bad player, pulling mobs as a healer or dps, doing crappy dps, And not taking advice when people give it to him/her. This person acts like a clueless gorilla with alzheimers, and might surprise you with a "WTf this grop fails, you guise are gay111!!" at the end of a run after a wipe

The Jaded Vet
This is the guy that really shouldn't be in heroics, but is forced to anyway. First he wanted his puppy on the first day, then he needed his frost badges each day after that. He's in 258 gear, head to toe, and earned every single piece of it. He doesn't really need a group to clear the instance; he's just after the teleport. He once gave helpful advice to the other players, but repeating himself 20 times each day lost it's appeal quickly, and the macros he made to explain the fights just made him look like a dick. He then became more and more obsessed with how bad everyone is before completely losing faith in humanity and refusing to speak to pugs ever again. This can be the tank with 65% of the group's damage out, the mage that only autoattacks things because an Ice Lance will pull aggro off the tank, or the healer that has perfected the Holy Paladin FCFS priority.

The I'm the tank

These tanks are extremely annoying, they are not necessarily all bad players, but they always refuse to accept that anything they did was wrong or can be improved in the way they pull or use their abilities, they often say something along the lines of "I'm the tank, the way I do it goes," or "I don't care if it is better, we are doing it my way". They often get furious when a DPSer does the more convenient thing to do that he refuses to do. Examples of what they do are the tanks who get angry when you point out that it is better if you pulled the PoS tunnel mobs to the middle circle, kill them, and run to end to save time, or the pally tank who threatens to kick the DK who DGs one of the hunters or mages in HoR to prevent the healer from taking threat.




The Rambo Tank.
This is the guy that believes now that he's fully Triumph geared, he can tank everything. Unfortunately, one attack on any of the mobs will lead him to lose aggro on that immediately, and ussually will cause one of the dps to die because of his innability to use his taunt. Will continue ranting afterwards about easing up on dps and that it's the dps's own fault.(granted that it could have been, but really is just a coverup for his lack of skill/brain.)

Let's Que For Another!
DPS who at the end of a run want to re-que. Always the bottom dps can be a fail healer very rarely a tank. These players lucked into a good group who didn't kick them and now want to ride the gravy train as long as possible. Normally harmless but can revert to stalking if they are on your server.

I often find it hard to tell them "Look you're not very good and TBH id rather take my chance with a random."


It's my Alt I Don't Have to be Good.

Players who believe that because this char is their 2nd, 3rd, maybe even 4th lvl 80 it is an excuse for sucking. Not the same as fresh 80s this player is both geared and knowledgeable but simply refuses to learn his class / spec because it's not his main.

My Main is 5/5 ToGC 25

A sub group of the group above. Players who think that because they have a main that is good geared and they play well it makes up for terrible play on other chars. Player often is lying or exaggerating his main and will often disappear when you ask for a name to armory

The Bored Healer
Usually a very overgeared healer who does nothing more then spam his Holy Light, Chain Heal, or AOE heals because he's bored. If things get too bored he might pull some mobs and spamheal himself to *heal-tank* them. You can also frequently see him doing dps with things like Flame Shock-Lava Burst, or Judgements.

The Faceless, Nameless Last-Second HoldoutYou know 'em. You've seen 'em. You have no fucking idea who they are.

You wait for a dungeon queue - this takes somewhere between ten seconds and ten minutes - and then a group pops up. You click "Enter Dungeon". You and three others have the checkmarks, but the last one seems to be dithering...and then a big red X pops up. You don't know who it is, you don't know where they are...so let's just call them "Lord Fuckendouche". Thanks a lot, Lord Fuckendouche, now I've gotta wait for another group.

Especially annoying if you're queued for a specific dungeon.

The Real Silent Type
The player that does 5k on trash pulls and 6k+ on bosses, MDs the tank before every pull uses cooldowns almost every time they are up. Realizes when mobs are attacking healers and gets them off the healer, while popping defensive cooldowns. Carries the group in most cases, but doesn't say a thing about it. Only talks when is needed, and only enough to explain the fight. Sometimes stays when in a terrible dungeon like Occulus, though he regrets it every time they pull. Everyone loves him, without knowing they do.

The Lolboy
You guessed it; use the abbreviation "lol" more then punctuation. Although they're slacking on anything imaginable, this kid finds everything funny: "I pulled lol", "lol Im red". Sometimes type "loooool" to stress it's reaaaly funny this time. Reverse smileys "P:" and jump sideways a lot. Have many pets and lol at yours. Ask you where you got your [insert item here] and if they can get food, healthstones, loot for offspec or even a boost on their alts. Turn against them and they add "wtf", "ffs" and "nub" to their vocabulary. Represents roughly 90% of your realm population.

The 'Just Took A Hit of Speed' Tank

A tank who consistently loses LOS of the healer and/or does not stay with the group. Usually those tanks who took a hit of speed or some type of illegal stimulant before the entrance into the queue and have to speed-run the entire instance or simply pull the entire instance without waiting for group members to receive buffs, full health, mana, etc. Tank simply runs in right away when showing up from queue. Usually, the tank is fighting another mob while the group is fighting another from before. Will also pull in trash mobs in with the boss.

The Mavis Beacon Social Butterfly

One who types out every thought and attempts to carry on a conversation with other group members while in a heroic dungeon and whose performance is severely sub-par. Politely asked to stop and concentrate on the dungeon but still continues to type.

[Firecrest]

The Jaded Vet
This is the guy that really shouldn't be in heroics, but is forced to anyway. First he wanted his puppy on the first day, then he needed his frost badges each day after that. He's in 258 gear, head to toe, and earned every single piece of it. He doesn't really need a group to clear the instance; he's just after the teleport. He once gave helpful advice to the other players, but repeating himself 20 times each day lost it's appeal quickly, and the macros he made to explain the fights just made him look like a dick. He then became more and more obsessed with how bad everyone is before completely losing faith in humanity and refusing to speak to pugs ever again. This can be the tank with 65% of the group's damage out, the mage that only autoattacks things because an Ice Lance will pull aggro off the tank, or the healer that has perfected the Holy Paladin FCFS priority.

Sup Firecrest here.

[mascaron]

The 'Just Took A Hit of Speed' Tank

A tank who consistently loses LOS of the healer and/or does not stay with the group. Usually those tanks who took a hit of speed or some type of illegal stimulant before the entrance into the queue and have to speed-run the entire instance or simply pull the entire instance without waiting for group members to receive buffs, full health, mana, etc. Tank simply runs in right away when showing up from queue. Usually, the tank is fighting another mob while the group is fighting another from before. Will also pull in trash mobs in with the boss.

sup abe here

[Archlight]

The 'Just Took A Hit of Speed' Tank

A tank who consistently loses LOS of the healer and/or does not stay with the group. Usually those tanks who took a hit of speed or some type of illegal stimulant before the entrance into the queue and have to speed-run the entire instance or simply pull the entire instance without waiting for group members to receive buffs, full health, mana, etc. Tank simply runs in right away when showing up from queue. Usually, the tank is fighting another mob while the group is fighting another from before. Will also pull in trash mobs in with the boss.

:twisted: